Hi everyone.
Kim's quest for November has been to write a 50,000 word novel, start to finish, within the month. She's been taking part in NaNoWriMo (www.nanowrimo.org) and did in fact finish the job on November 27. She's exhilarated, exhausted and excited.
My writing quest for November was to do a good job on the report cards that we produce for every student. I have the luxury of sharing a classroom with my teaching partner, Grace. Grace does the major part of the work, but I still had hours of pondering and preparing my part of those report cards for those kidlets and their families. As teachers we do wonder sometimes about how valuable these reports are, and especially WHO those reports are for: student, parent or us as educators? Interesting. Anyway I am finished, and actually just got home from the last of the parent/teacher interviews. It was lovely to meet with the parents of all my students and see a bit of the home side of their lives. I love my class.
Tomorrow I am off to Saskatoon to spend a few days with Mom. Her first oncology appointment is on Monday, so we'll be there to hear what impact the cancer has had on her body, and what the next few months may look like. Steve will fly to Saskatoon just for the appointment, and head home again right after. He'll hopefully be able to translate all the technical information we're given. (Thanks to WestJet for having a seat sale just at the right time for this weekend!)
We're grateful as well to Steve's parents who will be staying with the kids, to my friend Joyce for bringing chili, and to our kids for being so flexible.
Most of all we are grateful to see God working in our lives every day. He is faithful in the small things: writing a novel in a month, plowing through important report cards, providing affordable plane fares. He will be faithful in the big things as well.
Friday, December 01, 2006
Friday, November 10, 2006
Eh. Huh?
I hear it every day. When we lived in California we used to get asked about it, even though we were careful not to use it. It's an accepted part of life in Canada.
Eh?
What is it about that particular phoneme that symbolizes so much about Canadians? And why does nearly everyone, educated or not; brown or tan or pinky white; young or old, say that particular syllable?
eh?
Don't know. I don't know why people just south of the border into America don't say it, but people on the Northerly side all seem to. Maybe it just resounds in my ear because I didn't hear it (barring trips back to Canada) for ten years.
All I know is that, increasingly, and somewhat without my permission, I hear it passing my own lips. I hear what sounds amazingly like my OWN voice say it at the end of sentences, or when I am looking to change a statement into a question with one easy syllable.
Americans sometimes mock "eh" as a symbol of the beery "dumb Canadian" they see on TV. Just as Canadians mock Americans for what they perceive to be true from exposure to the media, they're wrong. "Eh" is not a sound of ignorance or lack of understanding. Instead, I have come to see "eh" as a particularly Canadian punctuation mark. It's a polite sound that symbolizes our desire to be understood. "Wow, those oil prices, eh?" "You're working on your PhD, eh?" "You'll bring the bean dip, eh?" It's a syllable that implies agreement, reconciliation and a hope for unity and peaceful discussion. Very noble Canadian attitudes, all.
Americans have several words that they use for the same purpose. "Huh" "Yeah" "Hey" Whatever, they all end up sprinkled throughout conversations like salt.
I'll go ahead and use it. Hopefully I can control my participation in the great "eh" campaign to a few "ehs" now and then. Like salt, "eh" is best used sparingly to add flavour. I like it. It sounds like home, eh?
Eh?
What is it about that particular phoneme that symbolizes so much about Canadians? And why does nearly everyone, educated or not; brown or tan or pinky white; young or old, say that particular syllable?
eh?
Don't know. I don't know why people just south of the border into America don't say it, but people on the Northerly side all seem to. Maybe it just resounds in my ear because I didn't hear it (barring trips back to Canada) for ten years.
All I know is that, increasingly, and somewhat without my permission, I hear it passing my own lips. I hear what sounds amazingly like my OWN voice say it at the end of sentences, or when I am looking to change a statement into a question with one easy syllable.
Americans sometimes mock "eh" as a symbol of the beery "dumb Canadian" they see on TV. Just as Canadians mock Americans for what they perceive to be true from exposure to the media, they're wrong. "Eh" is not a sound of ignorance or lack of understanding. Instead, I have come to see "eh" as a particularly Canadian punctuation mark. It's a polite sound that symbolizes our desire to be understood. "Wow, those oil prices, eh?" "You're working on your PhD, eh?" "You'll bring the bean dip, eh?" It's a syllable that implies agreement, reconciliation and a hope for unity and peaceful discussion. Very noble Canadian attitudes, all.
Americans have several words that they use for the same purpose. "Huh" "Yeah" "Hey" Whatever, they all end up sprinkled throughout conversations like salt.
I'll go ahead and use it. Hopefully I can control my participation in the great "eh" campaign to a few "ehs" now and then. Like salt, "eh" is best used sparingly to add flavour. I like it. It sounds like home, eh?
Friday, November 03, 2006
On the convergence of weather and candy.
Well, suddenly it's winter.
A couple of days before Halloween, Calgary was covered with a thick layer of the white stuff. It looked really pretty - except for all the cars sliding off of streets, all the flashing lights of emergency vehicles, etc.
Although we had hopes, the 31st was still cold and frosty.
This touched off all sorts of reminiscing for Steve and me. I particularly remember heading out as a kid with my costume completely covered with a snowsuit. Just the mask let anyone know that I was actually coming to the door for the CANDY, thank you very much!
Kim was at work on the big night, wearing her kimono. Apparently Staples was so quiet that the employees were put to work, (hear the humor in this) putting up Christmas decorations. April and Benton both went out, and we managed to keep them both warm and costumed.
This will be April's last year out. We were ready to cut her off after last year, but all of her friends were going trick or treating so why not. They all put a lot of work into their costumes, and I think the candy acquisition was secondary.
Benton had a fabulous time around our neighbourhood wearing his robot costume. He and Steve wired it up with every LED, laser pointer and battery operated flasher they could find. He was visible a block away.
At the end of the evening, Steve and I sorted their candy as parents do, looking for anything creepy. More reminiscing: the smell of halloween candy is unique and unchanged from when I was 10.
The snow is still with us. We aren't too sorry about that as God gave us a beautiful fall with shirtsleeve weather as late as last week. Only 5 months till spring! In the meantime... let's eat candy!
A couple of days before Halloween, Calgary was covered with a thick layer of the white stuff. It looked really pretty - except for all the cars sliding off of streets, all the flashing lights of emergency vehicles, etc.
Although we had hopes, the 31st was still cold and frosty.
This touched off all sorts of reminiscing for Steve and me. I particularly remember heading out as a kid with my costume completely covered with a snowsuit. Just the mask let anyone know that I was actually coming to the door for the CANDY, thank you very much!
Kim was at work on the big night, wearing her kimono. Apparently Staples was so quiet that the employees were put to work, (hear the humor in this) putting up Christmas decorations. April and Benton both went out, and we managed to keep them both warm and costumed.
This will be April's last year out. We were ready to cut her off after last year, but all of her friends were going trick or treating so why not. They all put a lot of work into their costumes, and I think the candy acquisition was secondary.
Benton had a fabulous time around our neighbourhood wearing his robot costume. He and Steve wired it up with every LED, laser pointer and battery operated flasher they could find. He was visible a block away.
At the end of the evening, Steve and I sorted their candy as parents do, looking for anything creepy. More reminiscing: the smell of halloween candy is unique and unchanged from when I was 10.
The snow is still with us. We aren't too sorry about that as God gave us a beautiful fall with shirtsleeve weather as late as last week. Only 5 months till spring! In the meantime... let's eat candy!
Friday, October 27, 2006
Cycles
Hi.
Well, the lymph node report is in and it looks like of the 9 nodes taken, 2 are malignant. Although it's hard for me to tell from this far away, Mom seems to be handling the news ok. We haven't told our kids yet...we'll do that this weekend. I suppose the next bit of information to glean is a liver scan, which has not yet been scheduled.
Again I feel this weird sense of being in two places. I am so thankful to be home, going on with my family in our normal daily cycle. At the same time I feel drawn to Saskatoon and the happenings in Mom's life. I imagine this is what it will feel like when the kids start leaving the nest: split responsibilities.
From where I sit at my desk, here at home, I can see out the window and look at the sky and the open land southwest of Calgary. The cycle of seasons goes on out there: colours and shades, cool air and change.
In the quiet of this hour I find myself trying to let go of fall and mentally prepare for winter. The garage needs to have the bikes moved out so we can park both cars in there again. The yard needs to be cleaned up for it's winter rest.
What stage of the cycle are we at with Mom? It's nowhere near time to give up and let go, and yet at the same time there are thoughts to be considered. Preparations for more tests. Decisions to be made for chemo, or not for chemo.
Thankfully we know that there is a Master in charge of the seasons. There is a Master in charge of my Mom and her physical, mental and spiritual well being. The same Master that has shown He always brings spring gives us a future and a hope.
Love from
Susan
Well, the lymph node report is in and it looks like of the 9 nodes taken, 2 are malignant. Although it's hard for me to tell from this far away, Mom seems to be handling the news ok. We haven't told our kids yet...we'll do that this weekend. I suppose the next bit of information to glean is a liver scan, which has not yet been scheduled.
Again I feel this weird sense of being in two places. I am so thankful to be home, going on with my family in our normal daily cycle. At the same time I feel drawn to Saskatoon and the happenings in Mom's life. I imagine this is what it will feel like when the kids start leaving the nest: split responsibilities.
From where I sit at my desk, here at home, I can see out the window and look at the sky and the open land southwest of Calgary. The cycle of seasons goes on out there: colours and shades, cool air and change.
In the quiet of this hour I find myself trying to let go of fall and mentally prepare for winter. The garage needs to have the bikes moved out so we can park both cars in there again. The yard needs to be cleaned up for it's winter rest.
What stage of the cycle are we at with Mom? It's nowhere near time to give up and let go, and yet at the same time there are thoughts to be considered. Preparations for more tests. Decisions to be made for chemo, or not for chemo.
Thankfully we know that there is a Master in charge of the seasons. There is a Master in charge of my Mom and her physical, mental and spiritual well being. The same Master that has shown He always brings spring gives us a future and a hope.
Love from
Susan
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
It's Good to be Home
Hi again.
What a gift it is to be home again, back in the whirl of kids and Steve and dogs and school. Last night as we sat down to supper I looked around the table at my little family and was just happy. I spent a whole week away and missed them all so much.
At the same time, I am longing to be back in Saskatoon with Mom! Aren't humans funny that way? We can experience completely opposite emotions, both at the same time.
Mom continues to do well recovering from the surgery. What a star. She doesn't complain about drains and dressings. She talks about how the incision hurts, but it isn't really "painful." She is so stoic. Lots would spend the recovery trying to make everyone feel sorry for them, but not Mom! I really admire that; hopefully I can remember the lesson!
We find out the lymph node results on Thursday. I guess that's the next hurdle but let's take them only one at a time.
My own family seems to have weathered my absence quite well. The kids are happy, fed and clean. The house looks great. The dogs were ecstatic to see me. My students gave me a thousand hugs at school yesterday. It's good to be home.
Love,
Susan
What a gift it is to be home again, back in the whirl of kids and Steve and dogs and school. Last night as we sat down to supper I looked around the table at my little family and was just happy. I spent a whole week away and missed them all so much.
At the same time, I am longing to be back in Saskatoon with Mom! Aren't humans funny that way? We can experience completely opposite emotions, both at the same time.
Mom continues to do well recovering from the surgery. What a star. She doesn't complain about drains and dressings. She talks about how the incision hurts, but it isn't really "painful." She is so stoic. Lots would spend the recovery trying to make everyone feel sorry for them, but not Mom! I really admire that; hopefully I can remember the lesson!
We find out the lymph node results on Thursday. I guess that's the next hurdle but let's take them only one at a time.
My own family seems to have weathered my absence quite well. The kids are happy, fed and clean. The house looks great. The dogs were ecstatic to see me. My students gave me a thousand hugs at school yesterday. It's good to be home.
Love,
Susan
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Over A Hurdle
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for your prayers and kind words yesterday. Mom's surgery was in the afternoon and it seems to have gone quite well. She was awfully unhappy last night with vertigo and nausea but is much better today.
Unfortunately the cancer seems to be the less desirable ductal variety but right now we're just concentrating on getting better from the surgery. Mom's doctor was really encouraging about the expected recovery from this; he said to expect to do well, and to FEEL well in a pretty short period of time.
I know more about breast cancer than I did a month ago, that's for sure. Maybe a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but we learn about the circumstances of life as we proceed through them, don't we? I know I will be really faithful about my mammograms now, for the rest of my life.
I continue to be so burstingly (that's a grade one word!!) proud of my Mom. She is awesome. She is stepping out into the circumstances of her life with prayer, humour, hope and realism.
Love to you all - keep praying,
Susan
Thanks for your prayers and kind words yesterday. Mom's surgery was in the afternoon and it seems to have gone quite well. She was awfully unhappy last night with vertigo and nausea but is much better today.
Unfortunately the cancer seems to be the less desirable ductal variety but right now we're just concentrating on getting better from the surgery. Mom's doctor was really encouraging about the expected recovery from this; he said to expect to do well, and to FEEL well in a pretty short period of time.
I know more about breast cancer than I did a month ago, that's for sure. Maybe a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but we learn about the circumstances of life as we proceed through them, don't we? I know I will be really faithful about my mammograms now, for the rest of my life.
I continue to be so burstingly (that's a grade one word!!) proud of my Mom. She is awesome. She is stepping out into the circumstances of her life with prayer, humour, hope and realism.
Love to you all - keep praying,
Susan
Friday, October 13, 2006
Shameless advertising
Ok, we have a new favourite tv ad. The dachshund one for the cellphone company was the best... until now.
Check it out - click on the "Commercial 1" link on this site:
http://www.prnewswire.com/mnr/petsmart/22602/
Check it out - click on the "Commercial 1" link on this site:
http://www.prnewswire.com/mnr/petsmart/22602/
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Thanksgiving
After 10 years of celebrating Thanksgiving in November, it still feels odd to dust off our traditions in early October! When we lived in California, Thanksgiving was the beginning of the "holiday season" and we'd usually go get our tree the day after gorging on Turkey and my specialty, Sweet Potatoes With Cream Cheese. Yum.
Arguably our favourite family tradition is our Thanksgiving tablecloth. We began it in 1997. It's just an ordinary cloth, not at all the kind I usually buy. What makes this one special is that every year, everyone gathered around our Thanksgiving table takes a fabric marker and writes about what they're thankful for. These days, as soon as I spread it out on the table, while the turkey is sizzling contentedly in the oven, everyone circles around and starts reading.
In 1997, Benton was thankful for gingerbread boys. Every year, April mentions some pet or other. Kim often mentions her friends. We laugh at who couldn't spell, who wrote numbers backwards (April!) and reminisce about the friends and family that have celebrated with us. Our dear friends the Garcias were often participants in our tablecloth traditions, as were many people who have passed through our lives.
What precious memories. This year, I wrote "I am thankful for God's plan."
I am also thankful for everyone who has sat around this tablecloth over the years. Thankful for the little handprints of children too young to write. Thankful for every misspelled word and funny looking drawing. Thankful for the LOVE.
Good night, everyone. I'm thankful for you, even if you haven't had a chance to write on my tablecloth. Maybe next year?
Love,
Susan
Arguably our favourite family tradition is our Thanksgiving tablecloth. We began it in 1997. It's just an ordinary cloth, not at all the kind I usually buy. What makes this one special is that every year, everyone gathered around our Thanksgiving table takes a fabric marker and writes about what they're thankful for. These days, as soon as I spread it out on the table, while the turkey is sizzling contentedly in the oven, everyone circles around and starts reading.
In 1997, Benton was thankful for gingerbread boys. Every year, April mentions some pet or other. Kim often mentions her friends. We laugh at who couldn't spell, who wrote numbers backwards (April!) and reminisce about the friends and family that have celebrated with us. Our dear friends the Garcias were often participants in our tablecloth traditions, as were many people who have passed through our lives.
What precious memories. This year, I wrote "I am thankful for God's plan."
I am also thankful for everyone who has sat around this tablecloth over the years. Thankful for the little handprints of children too young to write. Thankful for every misspelled word and funny looking drawing. Thankful for the LOVE.
Good night, everyone. I'm thankful for you, even if you haven't had a chance to write on my tablecloth. Maybe next year?
Love,
Susan
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Clucking
OK. So my husband has this quirky sense of humour, right? Sometime last year he came home all happy about this "perfect ring tone" he'd heard on someone's cell phone. He proceeded to find it online and download it to his phone.
Except... it went to MY phone instead of his. Blame TelusMobility.
It's a clucking chicken ring tone. Buuuck, bruuuuuck, bukbuk. Brauuuuk, bruuuuuauk, bucbruuuuuck... Now my phone clucks like a broody hen.
Thinking it was funny, and since my phone doesn't actually ring that often, I left it on the chicken ring tone for a few months and then changed it back to some innocuous song.
Last month, April changed it back to the chicken. Not enough chickens in our lives.
Fast forward to yesterday.....
Calgary is a big city with lots of classy places to shop. Yesterday I was in this VERY classy mall (lots of travertine, fountains, $$$), thankfully in Old Navy. My phone rings. Multiple people give my purse quizzical looks. Calmly, I take out my phone and talk to my friend Kerry, trying to look as though my purse makes clucking noises normally and I'm not at all concerned by this.
Later, I'm taking an elevator down to the parking garage, riding with an older, dignified couple who have probably just gone out for a lovely lunch and are heading back to their BMW. They look disapprovingly at my bright and colourful Old Navy bag. I am overcome by desire to exit the elevator before my phone rings again.
Think about this next time you call me on my cell phone! If I sound like I've just had a good laugh, it's probably still set on "chicken."
Susan
Except... it went to MY phone instead of his. Blame TelusMobility.
It's a clucking chicken ring tone. Buuuck, bruuuuuck, bukbuk. Brauuuuk, bruuuuuauk, bucbruuuuuck... Now my phone clucks like a broody hen.
Thinking it was funny, and since my phone doesn't actually ring that often, I left it on the chicken ring tone for a few months and then changed it back to some innocuous song.
Last month, April changed it back to the chicken. Not enough chickens in our lives.
Fast forward to yesterday.....
Calgary is a big city with lots of classy places to shop. Yesterday I was in this VERY classy mall (lots of travertine, fountains, $$$), thankfully in Old Navy. My phone rings. Multiple people give my purse quizzical looks. Calmly, I take out my phone and talk to my friend Kerry, trying to look as though my purse makes clucking noises normally and I'm not at all concerned by this.
Later, I'm taking an elevator down to the parking garage, riding with an older, dignified couple who have probably just gone out for a lovely lunch and are heading back to their BMW. They look disapprovingly at my bright and colourful Old Navy bag. I am overcome by desire to exit the elevator before my phone rings again.
Think about this next time you call me on my cell phone! If I sound like I've just had a good laugh, it's probably still set on "chicken."
Susan
Friday, September 29, 2006
Finally a surgery date.
Well, we finally have a surgery date for Mom. Oct 16th she'll have the operative biopsy and possibly a mastectomy.
Difficult as it is to be facing this, it's far better than the waiting we've been doing over the past 2.5 weeks. Now we can plan... Mom can plan her life a bit, I can get ready for a substitute teacher, and plan for what Steve and the kids are going to do while I'm away.
So many details! Lots to do, but I'm so glad I have such great friends. What a great support you all are.
Pray for Mom, and for the rest of us too!
Love,
Susan
Difficult as it is to be facing this, it's far better than the waiting we've been doing over the past 2.5 weeks. Now we can plan... Mom can plan her life a bit, I can get ready for a substitute teacher, and plan for what Steve and the kids are going to do while I'm away.
So many details! Lots to do, but I'm so glad I have such great friends. What a great support you all are.
Pray for Mom, and for the rest of us too!
Love,
Susan
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Pride and Pain
It seems like life throws us a curve ball every now and again. I believe that the curve balls are carefully tossed by a loving Creator that we are too small to understand. We see only the pain and the pressure, not the plan and the purpose. I was talking with our daughter April last night and we reached the conclusion that if we could totally understand God, and stay one step ahead of Him, then He would be as limited as we are.
This fall, our curve ball is that my Mom, Orion, has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Not something anyone would sign up for, huh?
Mom's attitude has been stellar. She talks about how she is going to fight this. How she plans to be strong. At the same time she talks about how she has had 79 sweet years, and no regrets about the things she had any control over. (I know she wishes that Dad, and my brother John, had had more years to spend here on Earth with her.)
I have never been as proud of my Mother as I am right now. She is stepping forward in dignity, with a sense of humour, and with loving concern for those around her. Her amazing attitude has truly set the tone for the rest of the family.
The Planner of everything is the only one who knows what the next months hold. Surgery, chemo, trips back and forth to Mom's, hospitals, phone calls from here to Saskatoon and back again.
I am part of the "sandwich generation" now, aren't I? I only hope I can grow into my "seasoned years" with the same energy, humour and grace that my Mother has.
Thanks for reading. If you are the type to, please pray for us.
Susan
This fall, our curve ball is that my Mom, Orion, has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Not something anyone would sign up for, huh?
Mom's attitude has been stellar. She talks about how she is going to fight this. How she plans to be strong. At the same time she talks about how she has had 79 sweet years, and no regrets about the things she had any control over. (I know she wishes that Dad, and my brother John, had had more years to spend here on Earth with her.)
I have never been as proud of my Mother as I am right now. She is stepping forward in dignity, with a sense of humour, and with loving concern for those around her. Her amazing attitude has truly set the tone for the rest of the family.
The Planner of everything is the only one who knows what the next months hold. Surgery, chemo, trips back and forth to Mom's, hospitals, phone calls from here to Saskatoon and back again.
I am part of the "sandwich generation" now, aren't I? I only hope I can grow into my "seasoned years" with the same energy, humour and grace that my Mother has.
Thanks for reading. If you are the type to, please pray for us.
Susan
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
We'll miss you, Vince.
Vince Bjorndahl was one of our first friends after our move to Calgary. Vince & Shauna were in our home Bible study group for the first two years after we arrived here.
We were lost people, in a way, Steve and I. New city, new church, new home, new beginning. Vince and Shauna, along with the rest of the small group, were a big part of our settling in that first hard year.
In December of 2004, Vince was diagnosed with a rare and aggresive form of cancer. Since then, we have been witnesses to a family grown strong with grief. After surgeries and chemo and radiation, Vince remained humble but not beaten. And his heart - what a joy to watch his heart grow strong with faith.
Being somewhat new and somewhat peripheral to the Bjorndahl's lives we have been among the many who tried not to intrude, who tried to be helpful and not harmful. I suppose we erred on the "staying out of the way" side of the equation. I know we never got the spend the hours of laughter with Vince that we wanted to. Selfishly we wish we had intruded more. We prayed for Vince, for Shauna, for the children, whenever God brought them to mind. God brought them to mind many times every day.
Vince went to Glory last night. As Shauna says, He is now the "In-Vince-able" Vince that God has in store for him.
Weak and wounded sinner Lost and left to die
We were lost people, in a way, Steve and I. New city, new church, new home, new beginning. Vince and Shauna, along with the rest of the small group, were a big part of our settling in that first hard year.
In December of 2004, Vince was diagnosed with a rare and aggresive form of cancer. Since then, we have been witnesses to a family grown strong with grief. After surgeries and chemo and radiation, Vince remained humble but not beaten. And his heart - what a joy to watch his heart grow strong with faith.
Being somewhat new and somewhat peripheral to the Bjorndahl's lives we have been among the many who tried not to intrude, who tried to be helpful and not harmful. I suppose we erred on the "staying out of the way" side of the equation. I know we never got the spend the hours of laughter with Vince that we wanted to. Selfishly we wish we had intruded more. We prayed for Vince, for Shauna, for the children, whenever God brought them to mind. God brought them to mind many times every day.
Vince went to Glory last night. As Shauna says, He is now the "In-Vince-able" Vince that God has in store for him.
Chris Rice - Untitled Hymn
Weak and wounded sinner Lost and left to die
O, raise your head, for love is passing by
Come to Jesus, Come to Jesus, Come to Jesus and live!
Now your burden's lifted And carried far away
And precious blood has washed away the stain, so
Sing to Jesus, Sing to Jesus, Sing to Jesus and live!
And like a newborn baby Don't be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk Sometimes we fall...so
Fall on Jesus, Fall on Jesus, Fall on Jesus and live!
Sometimes the way is lonely And steep and filled with pain
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then
Cry to Jesus, Cry to Jesus, Cry to Jesus and live!
O, and when the love spills over And music fills the night
And when you can't contain your joy inside, then
Dance for Jesus, Dance for Jesus, Dance for Jesus and live!
And with your final heartbeat Kiss the world goodbye
Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory's side, and
Fly to Jesus, Fly to Jesus, Fly to Jesus and live!
Bye for now, Vince. We're richer because you spent time here. See you.
Love,
Susan for the Bowens
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Rambling and Venting
I did write a pithy, articulate "1st Post" for this yesterday, but one of my "failures" was losing my whole blog and having to start all over again. Let's try one more time, and I'll see what I can remember:
Beginning a blog may be one of the most self-oriented acts I've done in my adult life. Assuming that anyone else might want to read my online journal seems arrogant and pretentious. At the same time, however, I am really feeling the need to vent, to talk through events and to journal, for my benefit if not for anyone else's.
Talking things through has always been therapeutic for me. While others might argue that I already talk plenty, the need to get out a whole thought from beginning to end, without being interrupted by the kids, the dogs, the phone, is challenging me to try this!
For YOU, the benefit is that you don't have to listen to me if you don't want to!
Like everyone's, my life is a work in progress. Life is sweet. Even when circumstances threaten me, when I feel overwhelmed, life is still sweet.
Beginning a blog may be one of the most self-oriented acts I've done in my adult life. Assuming that anyone else might want to read my online journal seems arrogant and pretentious. At the same time, however, I am really feeling the need to vent, to talk through events and to journal, for my benefit if not for anyone else's.
Talking things through has always been therapeutic for me. While others might argue that I already talk plenty, the need to get out a whole thought from beginning to end, without being interrupted by the kids, the dogs, the phone, is challenging me to try this!
For YOU, the benefit is that you don't have to listen to me if you don't want to!
Like everyone's, my life is a work in progress. Life is sweet. Even when circumstances threaten me, when I feel overwhelmed, life is still sweet.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Learning Curve
Don't you just love it when you don't get anything accomplished? You know what I mean ... the days when you read, or shop, or hang with a friend all day, and are conscious of "time well wasted." I happily whiled away many days that way this past summer, always aware of the stuff I SHOULD be doing instead of the stuff I was actually doing.
Today wasn't one of those days. I worked hard all day on projects. Strained and strove and struggled. And by the end of the day I had nothing to show for it. No triumphs, nothing to point to and say "look what I did today!!"
I was so burned out by the end of the day that when Steve called me before leaving work, I just told him, "We're going out for dinner." And we did. He brought home roses and a latte because he felt so bad for me.
I wonder why we need success, need to have something to show? I'm not that goal oriented. I think I just get frustrated about wasted effort. I wonder if it is because, like our Creator, we love to create? Except He's perfect, and always gets it right, and I sure don't.
Or maybe I'm just trying to find something to redeem the day.
Whatever the case I am so glad I have a husband who brings me coffee and roses and takes me out for dinner when I've had a bad day. I'm so thankful for my kids and my silly dogs. I'm thankful for my job and my colleagues.
I'm thankful that not every day is a bad day.
Today wasn't one of those days. I worked hard all day on projects. Strained and strove and struggled. And by the end of the day I had nothing to show for it. No triumphs, nothing to point to and say "look what I did today!!"
I was so burned out by the end of the day that when Steve called me before leaving work, I just told him, "We're going out for dinner." And we did. He brought home roses and a latte because he felt so bad for me.
I wonder why we need success, need to have something to show? I'm not that goal oriented. I think I just get frustrated about wasted effort. I wonder if it is because, like our Creator, we love to create? Except He's perfect, and always gets it right, and I sure don't.
Or maybe I'm just trying to find something to redeem the day.
Whatever the case I am so glad I have a husband who brings me coffee and roses and takes me out for dinner when I've had a bad day. I'm so thankful for my kids and my silly dogs. I'm thankful for my job and my colleagues.
I'm thankful that not every day is a bad day.
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