Clucking

OK. So my husband has this quirky sense of humour, right? Sometime last year he came home all happy about this "perfect ring tone" he'd heard on someone's cell phone. He proceeded to find it online and download it to his phone.

Except... it went to MY phone instead of his. Blame TelusMobility.

It's a clucking chicken ring tone. Buuuck, bruuuuuck, bukbuk. Brauuuuk, bruuuuuauk, bucbruuuuuck... Now my phone clucks like a broody hen.

Thinking it was funny, and since my phone doesn't actually ring that often, I left it on the chicken ring tone for a few months and then changed it back to some innocuous song.

Last month, April changed it back to the chicken. Not enough chickens in our lives.

Fast forward to yesterday.....

Calgary is a big city with lots of classy places to shop. Yesterday I was in this VERY classy mall (lots of travertine, fountains, $$$), thankfully in Old Navy. My phone rings. Multiple people give my purse quizzical looks. Calmly, I take out my phone and talk to my friend Kerry, trying to look as though my purse makes clucking noises normally and I'm not at all concerned by this.

Later, I'm taking an elevator down to the parking garage, riding with an older, dignified couple who have probably just gone out for a lovely lunch and are heading back to their BMW. They look disapprovingly at my bright and colourful Old Navy bag. I am overcome by desire to exit the elevator before my phone rings again.

Think about this next time you call me on my cell phone! If I sound like I've just had a good laugh, it's probably still set on "chicken."

Susan

Finally a surgery date.

Well, we finally have a surgery date for Mom. Oct 16th she'll have the operative biopsy and possibly a mastectomy.

Difficult as it is to be facing this, it's far better than the waiting we've been doing over the past 2.5 weeks. Now we can plan... Mom can plan her life a bit, I can get ready for a substitute teacher, and plan for what Steve and the kids are going to do while I'm away.

So many details! Lots to do, but I'm so glad I have such great friends. What a great support you all are.

Pray for Mom, and for the rest of us too!

Love,
Susan

Pride and Pain

It seems like life throws us a curve ball every now and again. I believe that the curve balls are carefully tossed by a loving Creator that we are too small to understand. We see only the pain and the pressure, not the plan and the purpose. I was talking with our daughter April last night and we reached the conclusion that if we could totally understand God, and stay one step ahead of Him, then He would be as limited as we are.

This fall, our curve ball is that my Mom, Orion, has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Not something anyone would sign up for, huh?

Mom's attitude has been stellar. She talks about how she is going to fight this. How she plans to be strong. At the same time she talks about how she has had 79 sweet years, and no regrets about the things she had any control over. (I know she wishes that Dad, and my brother John, had had more years to spend here on Earth with her.)

I have never been as proud of my Mother as I am right now. She is stepping forward in dignity, with a sense of humour, and with loving concern for those around her. Her amazing attitude has truly set the tone for the rest of the family.

The Planner of everything is the only one who knows what the next months hold. Surgery, chemo, trips back and forth to Mom's, hospitals, phone calls from here to Saskatoon and back again.

I am part of the "sandwich generation" now, aren't I? I only hope I can grow into my "seasoned years" with the same energy, humour and grace that my Mother has.

Thanks for reading. If you are the type to, please pray for us.

Susan

We'll miss you, Vince.

Vince Bjorndahl was one of our first friends after our move to Calgary. Vince & Shauna were in our home Bible study group for the first two years after we arrived here.

We were lost people, in a way, Steve and I. New city, new church, new home, new beginning. Vince and Shauna, along with the rest of the small group, were a big part of our settling in that first hard year.

In December of 2004, Vince was diagnosed with a rare and aggresive form of cancer. Since then, we have been witnesses to a family grown strong with grief. After surgeries and chemo and radiation, Vince remained humble but not beaten. And his heart - what a joy to watch his heart grow strong with faith.

Being somewhat new and somewhat peripheral to the Bjorndahl's lives we have been among the many who tried not to intrude, who tried to be helpful and not harmful. I suppose we erred on the "staying out of the way" side of the equation. I know we never got the spend the hours of laughter with Vince that we wanted to. Selfishly we wish we had intruded more. We prayed for Vince, for Shauna, for the children, whenever God brought them to mind. God brought them to mind many times every day.

Vince went to Glory last night. As Shauna says, He is now the "In-Vince-able" Vince that God has in store for him.

Chris Rice - Untitled Hymn

Weak and wounded sinner Lost and left to die

O, raise your head, for love is passing by

Come to Jesus, Come to Jesus, Come to Jesus and live!

Now your burden's lifted And carried far away

And precious blood has washed away the stain, so

Sing to Jesus, Sing to Jesus, Sing to Jesus and live!

And like a newborn baby Don't be afraid to crawl

And remember when you walk Sometimes we fall...so

Fall on Jesus, Fall on Jesus, Fall on Jesus and live!

Sometimes the way is lonely And steep and filled with pain

So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then

Cry to Jesus, Cry to Jesus, Cry to Jesus and live!

O, and when the love spills over And music fills the night

And when you can't contain your joy inside, then

Dance for Jesus, Dance for Jesus, Dance for Jesus and live!

And with your final heartbeat Kiss the world goodbye

Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory's side, and

Fly to Jesus, Fly to Jesus, Fly to Jesus and live!

Bye for now, Vince. We're richer because you spent time here. See you.

Love,

Susan for the Bowens

Rambling and Venting

I did write a pithy, articulate "1st Post" for this yesterday, but one of my "failures" was losing my whole blog and having to start all over again. Let's try one more time, and I'll see what I can remember:

Beginning a blog may be one of the most self-oriented acts I've done in my adult life. Assuming that anyone else might want to read my online journal seems arrogant and pretentious. At the same time, however, I am really feeling the need to vent, to talk through events and to journal, for my benefit if not for anyone else's.

Talking things through has always been therapeutic for me. While others might argue that I already talk plenty, the need to get out a whole thought from beginning to end, without being interrupted by the kids, the dogs, the phone, is challenging me to try this!

For YOU, the benefit is that you don't have to listen to me if you don't want to!

Like everyone's, my life is a work in progress. Life is sweet. Even when circumstances threaten me, when I feel overwhelmed, life is still sweet.

Learning Curve

Don't you just love it when you don't get anything accomplished? You know what I mean ... the days when you read, or shop, or hang with a friend all day, and are conscious of "time well wasted." I happily whiled away many days that way this past summer, always aware of the stuff I SHOULD be doing instead of the stuff I was actually doing.

Today wasn't one of those days. I worked hard all day on projects. Strained and strove and struggled. And by the end of the day I had nothing to show for it. No triumphs, nothing to point to and say "look what I did today!!"

I was so burned out by the end of the day that when Steve called me before leaving work, I just told him, "We're going out for dinner." And we did. He brought home roses and a latte because he felt so bad for me.

I wonder why we need success, need to have something to show? I'm not that goal oriented. I think I just get frustrated about wasted effort. I wonder if it is because, like our Creator, we love to create? Except He's perfect, and always gets it right, and I sure don't.

Or maybe I'm just trying to find something to redeem the day.

Whatever the case I am so glad I have a husband who brings me coffee and roses and takes me out for dinner when I've had a bad day. I'm so thankful for my kids and my silly dogs. I'm thankful for my job and my colleagues.

I'm thankful that not every day is a bad day.